One morning last month, as I woke, I found myself mentally composing a letter to my sons. Because of the powerful way the letter spilled from my dream into my waking reality, I knew these words could not be ignored. So I grabbed a latte, sat down at my computer and this is what I wrote.
Dear Alex and Owen,
My hopes for you are that you…
LOVE – Love others for who they are, not for who you want them to be. Allow others to love you in the same way.
DREAM BIG – Have the audacity to believe that you can do anything, be anything, and accomplish the impossible. Dreaming Big is scary. You may think that you aren’t worthy of your big dreams. Or you may feel that your big dreams do not seem very “important”. None of that matters. Living your dreams is not for others to judge. It is for you to believe in. It is for you to strive for. It is for you to own, embrace, and make come true.
BE KIND TO OTHERS – You will never know the journeys that the person next to you has taken. Believe in the good in humanity and treat people with kindness.
BE KIND TO YOURSELF – As humans our internal dialog can be awful, demeaning, mean, and a big waste of time. Be gentle in tough times, kindly challenge yourself when you need direction and guidance, and talk to yourself how you would talk to a cherished loved one.
LIVE IN YOUR TRUTH – Whether you are aware of it or not, intrinsically you know what is true. Your truth is uniquely yours. It is your personal north star. It is guiding and grounding. By following your truth and “knowing” your way through life, you will find happiness.
SHARE YOUR STORY – Share who you are and who you want to become. Talk about how you have faltered and what you have learned. Your experiences are important, special, unique and not to be compared. By sharing your story you connect with others and build meaningful relationships. Your story is a gift to share.
PRACTICE GRATITUDE – Take time to notice all the goodness all in your life and be humble and thankful.
FIND YOUR SOFT SPOTS TO LAND – Life can be hard. Life will be hard. We all need places to go to and people we can be with when we are feeling lost, vulnerable, raw, confused, angry or sad. Find your places and people and use them without shame. I hope our family will serve as one – but I will respect your choice when it is not.
TEACH OTHERS HOW YOU WANT TO BE TREATED – It is your boundaries and the way in which you communicate them that lets people know how to treat you. Learn what behaviors you will accept and be a part of, and which one you don’t. Set healthy boundaries and then act and speak accordingly.
LET YOURSELF FEEL THE HURT – You will go through hard, miserable times in your life. It’s OK. Fall down. Feel the pain. Be sad. Be mad. Be afraid. Cry. Sulk. Scream. Cower. And then, when you are ready – and maybe even before you are ready – get back up. Begin to recover and mend. Pain is a part of life but it is certain that you will learn and grow from the experience.
LET YOURSELF FEEL THE JOY – You will have wonderful, marvelous times in your life. Don’t be afraid to enjoy these times. Feel the Joy and Happiness. Hit “Pause” on the moment and breathe in the goodness. Acknowledge it, welcome it, embrace it, and celebrate. You deserve it!
KNOW THAT YOU ARE LOVED – Yes, you are loved. No matter what.
Love,
Mom
After I finished the letter, I got the chills. I knew that what I had written was from my heart and it felt important. I also realized that these hopes, while inspired by my sons, are not just for them. They are what I hope for everyone I love and even for myself!
So, in effort to have a visual reminder of these sentiments, I plan make a piece of artwork for each hope listed in the letter. My goal is to finish all 12 pieces this year (hopefully well before December).
This week I drew some sketches and am really excited to start to add color and textures!
I will give updates and share pics throughout the creation process.
Have a Happy Day!